HOW TO CREATE THE EXCITEMENT OF AN AFFAIR IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Kate Moyle, a psychosexual therapist, explains how to harness the feelings of temptation and lust for someone else with your partner *Don’t assume you know everything about each other. Ask questions with the same interest you did at the start of the relationship. *Flirt. The longer we’re in relationships the less we make an effort, as we feel that we already have them. Send a text during the day about looking forward to your evening plans – it doesn’t have to be explicit.

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Focus your sexual attention. Find a way to bring your mind into the bedroom. Try the Pillow app, which gives real-time audio instruction for intimacy exercises, such as guided massage. *Agree to not have penetrative sex or intercourse for a window of time. Taking sex off the menu for a fortnight can be a great way of rebuilding your desire for it. Allow yourselves to touch and tease but, when it gets to the point of intercourse, do something different.

Anticipation can be an amazing aphrodisiac. *Every time you have sex, change one thing. A routine can be a passion killer. You don’t have to alter anything big. Start with clothes on/off or try a different room, then build up to new positions, using toys or relinquishing control for the night. *Don’t rely on your partner to give you everything. Use your friends and family to nurture yourself and always communicate your needs to avoid mutual frustration.

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