To escape his dark moods and honor his ambitions, Tom decided to hire a coach. At first during yoga, Tom focused on his childhood and the low-level emotional trauma he believed he suffered. All this work helped him understand himself better but had little impact on his blue mood. His coach slowly got him interested in paying more and more attention to what he wanted his life to look like in the future including what he wanted his mood to feel like.
While this future-oriented vision work allowed Tom to picture what his life could look like, it was obviously not the complete answer to his problems and his quest. He needed to add additional approaches, and luckily his coach recommended a number of options. One of them involved working with a greater focus on dating. During these sessions concentrating on dating, the coach became aware that Tom had never been in a serious relationship for more than a month or two. Typically, Tom dated women who he acknowledged were somewhat superficial and uninterested in commitment or marriage. He began to gain insights regarding the qualities he sought qualities that would help sustain a terrific relationship over time. Tom realized that he wanted to feel passion and experience mutual safety and commitment with a woman. With the coach’s help, he learned how to describe and recognize the qualities he sought.
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The coach also encouraged Tom to pursue his interest in religion and spirituality. Raised as a Catholic, Tom had fallen away from the church by the time he was in college, but he had retained an interest in different religions and had done a great deal of reading about them. When a friend invited Tom to go with him to a Unitarian church service, he went and enjoyed the experience greatly. Pretty soon he joined the congregation and became actively involved in church activities.
Over the next year, Tom also began dating a woman he met at religious services. He noticed that she possessed many of the qualities he sought in a mate. The dating soon evolved into a committed relationship and eventually led to marriage. Several years back, Tom had given up on ever meeting someone he would marry, so meeting this woman and marrying her felt like a real-life miracle.
The coach had also asked Tom to consult with a psychiatrist in town about taking medication. Tom agreed to take a very low dose of a safe and nonaddictive antidepressant medication. It seemed to help build his stress tolerance, mood, and resilience. Tom noticed that he enjoyed life more, things didn’t bother him as much, and his mood was consistently brighter.
So before long, with the multifaceted interventions just described, Tom’s satisfaction with life increased considerably. Progress was made because the coach was open to introducing simultaneous or multidimensional approaches to his client. Initially, Tom had been fixated on the emotional symptoms in the sphere of Self. He viewed most of his problems as developmental in nature (the Self sphere), but his coach helped him see that he also had to address life skills in the Self sphere and in other spheres as well Love (dating), Spirit (religion), and Body (medication), to name three before he could start leading a happier, more satisfying life.
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